actually, I'm a sock model
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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