I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize