Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
