His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
