i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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