Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
