that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
