He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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