isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
