and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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