Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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