**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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