so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
