Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize