I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
