...so i touched it.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Randomize
