Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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