She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
