I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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