So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
