at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
