You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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