You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
My Higher Power is John Stamos
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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