I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize