I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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