I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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