So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Randomize
