You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
