What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
