i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Randomize
