billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
people are starting to question the shark bite story
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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