About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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