are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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