Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
wrigley field is MILF paradise
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
