I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Randomize
