it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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