i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
