Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
