I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
