He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Randomize
