Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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