My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
