god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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