no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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