you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
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