Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
