Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
one might say we're banned from that church
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
