Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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