i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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