my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I think your dad took our porno
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
